Tag Archives: number

Old T-Shirts

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This Shirt is Long Gone

This Shirt is Long Gone

How many T-shirts does one person need?  That is the question that has bounced around my little pea of a brain many times.  The thing is, I have a lot of them T-shirts, not brains).  Occasionally, I weed through them and get rid of a few.  I turn them into rags if they are in really bad shape.  I give them away if they are in really good shape.  I sold one on eBay–a 1986 Dartmouth College Winter Carnival shirt with a Where the Wild Things Are theme in egg yolk yellow–that I had been hauling around for years.  I got 14 bucks for it.

I have too many T-shirts right now.  The problem is, they aren’t just random T-shirts.  I got them from all kinds of moments in my life–running marathons, working at outdoor education centers, time with friends, you know what I’m talking about.  Each T-shirt has a story.  I have one red T-shirt from the Atlanta Olympic games, 1996.  I was working at the University of Vermont and the woman whose desk was next to mine was wearing it.  I really liked it so I said to her:  ” I really like that shirt.  Can I have it?”  She said she wouldn’t just give it to me but would trade it for the one I was wearing (aqua, with a person jumping for a trapeze in the woods).  We both took off our shirts right then (I definitely got the better deal there) and I had a new shirt.

It is hard to give up a shirt with a story like that.  What about the high school program I did as a junior?  I still have the shirt, a one of a kind long sleever, but it is mighty tattered.  I keep it, rarely wear it, and decide to keep it again each time I rummage through the pile.  I have shirts that are over 20 years old.  That just seems silly.  I managed to get by just fine twenty years ago without twenty year old shirts, so why do I hang onto these?  Good question.

Nostalgia, that’s why.  I don’t need them all.  I mean, I have a whole drawer full of T-shirts.  So again the question:  How many T-shirts does one person need?  I know there isn’t really an answer to that question; at least, there isn’t only one answer.  But I think I may be ready to pare at this point.  I need to come up with a number so I can make some hard decisions.  I want some to wear around.  They are good summer wear, after all.  They aren’t all 20 years old, so keeping the newer ones seems to make sense.  I also sleep in them sometimes.  And I want some to wearing painting or weeding the garden or even just going for a hike.

Five clean ones and five for messing about?  That sounds good.  But I may have some trouble ditching the memory garb.  Maybe I can try for ten and give myself a maximum of twenty.  That might work.  Maybe I would end up with fifteen.  Last night I wore a marathon shirt from 1998 to bed.  I love that shirt.  Maybe I’ll keep that one.  And get rid of the marathon shirt from 2002.  I have two of those.  And I might be able to sell that Olympic one on eBay, but I like that one.

I don’t miss the Where the Wild Things Are shirt.  I can’t imagine that, once they are gone, I will miss any of the others.  But crap, kids, this could take a while.

Bazillion Versus Gajillion

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So which is bigger, a bazillion or a gajillion?  I vote for a bazillion but what do I look like?  A mathematician?  I feel like we use superlatives so often that they often have no meaning.  So really, what the hell difference does it make?

One of my least favorite superlatives is “extreme.”  While it isn’t as popular as it used to be, there are approximately a gajillion things out there labeled “extreme.”  There are fast food meals, frozen pizzas, video games, even underwear (“extreme comfort”).  I think it is a little ridiculous.  Hey, some marketer says, let’s hop on the extreme bandwagon.  Extreme sells.

I finally had my fill of extreme when I saw an advertisement (on a restroom wall poster of all places) for “Extreme” truck bed liners.  These were spray on liners for the beds of pickup trucks.  Extreme?  I mean, I can see how a climb up a remote rugged peak can be extreme.  I can see how an athletic event can be extreme (run across the Sahara anyone?).  I can even see how a hot pepper can be labeled extreme.  But a spray on truck bed liner?  That went too far.

So I am in pursuit of some answers.  Maybe you can help me out.  Which is bigger?  I really want to know what you think.  Let’s give some meaning to these terms.   I don’t need a number.  I know they aren’t real numbers.  I just need an answer:  Which do you think is bigger and why?

If I get at least 100 answers in the comments I will send a rubberized foam velociraptor to the best answer.  An extreme toy, if you will.  I look forward to hearing what you think.